When the Universe Says, "Snap out of it kid!"

It had been over 4 months since I was laid off from my job. Late at night, performing my usual ritual of exploring the internet, I came across a video on YouTube that changed my entire outlook on my life in a matter of 58 minutes. It was a taro reader and she was doing a broad reading. The title of the video said something like, "If you're seeing this, it was meant for you." I thought, nice hook but started to watch it anyway. As the video played I became more intrigued until I realized every single thing she said pinpointed what was going on in my life at that moment and even the way I was feeling about many things. By the end of the video, my head was reeling and my jaw probably stayed open for a good bit too. The most amazing thing was that the message was so incredibly simple. Stop forcing square pegs into circular holes. If you're doing something you don't enjoy - stop. Focus on what brings you joy. That simple message had me thinking deeply for days. I lost sight of what brought me joy a very long time ago but didn't even realize it. I became caught up in grief, depression, and anxiety due to past traumas and just never realized the extent of it. I worked to work, completely bypassing almost everything that brought me joy until nothing did bring me joy. I did what I had to do to survive - to exist but that's it. I wasn't feeding my soul, I was letting it wither away. So, the next day, I was laying in my bed, still thinking about that video and going back to my childhood. What made me happy then? Music. Singing. What else did I enjoy about it? I liked being able to connect with people and make them feel the music the way I did. I'm much older now and I still dabble with music but I'm also an avid gamer. Then it struck me. I wanted to stream but not just me playing video games. I wanted to stream so I could talk about my life. The experiences I've had. Things I am interested about. This new revelation I've had! Then I thought a blog would be nice too. Not everyone watches streams. Hell, I may even make videos at some point, who knows. But I'll tell you this. Once I figured out that my joy was in connecting with people and being able to have fun, deep, thoughtful, engaging conversation - that spark was back. The same spark I had when I realized how special music was to me in my life when I was a kid and went gung-ho into music, made a demo, and got a record contract. I was actually excited about something again. I hadn't felt this way since even before my partner passed away over 9 years ago. That's the gist of it. I hope you hang out with me for a while, whether it's here or on Twitch. The roadblock has been blasted to pieces, so who knows where we're going to go from here! Peace, love, and light,

Shayden

That video that changed everything: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9R7QSqtOY1s My Twitch channel: https://www.twitch.tv/lusciouspotato